I’m bored, but not bored enough to finish a new article. That means it’s time for Fun With Search Engines, the recurring site feature where I review some of the keywords that visitors to my site typed into search engines. This FWSE report is for the week of July 9 – July 15. As always, these are all actual searches. Let’s begin…

1. sheeva sexy pictures – There’s nothing sexy about a muscular female Shokan. She’s still slightly more attractive than Chyna though.

2. whomp em map – Assuming that you mean the level select screen, here:

      However, if you’re looking for actual maps of the game levels, then fuck you. The level design is pretty basic and you shouldn’t need goddam maps to make your way through the game.

3. eternal champions screenshot – Eternal Champions sucks.

4. i hate qix – Me too.

5. rebound sex light feelings – I have no fucking clue what that even means.

6. w axl rose the coolest rocker ever – I swear to God that I didn’t make this one up. I can’t say I disagree though.

7. movie shit injection – Again, I have no fucking clue what that means. Seriously, what makes someone type in something like that? Alcohol? Drugs? Psychosis? More importantly, where can I get me some?

      Well, that’s basically it. And as this entry draws to a close, it’s time once again to drop my new tagline: This FWSE has ended. Go in peace to love and serve pop culture.